Giving up Is Taking Over and What to Do About It

lost and giving up

Giving up might be easy. Do you have the courage to keep going? It does take courage to keep walking through your trials, or turn back and seek help.

Clearly, many do give up, the suicide statistics in Australia alone are food for thought.

https://www.blackdoginstitute.org.au/clinical-resources/suicide-self-harm/facts-about-suicide-in-australia

Is giving up really taking over our world?

If so… how can we counter this negative trend?

Make your own trend, but look to the past as well as the future.

Some thought I should just give in gracefully and die rather than go on oxygen. Well, it might have saved a tiny bit of money for the government but I believe I still have something to give.

My book ‘Living at the end of an Oxygen Tube’ would never have been written, and even although not released yet, it has led to some interesting conversations. It is my hope that not only does it help people who are prescribed home oxygen, but also those who care for them. It might surprise you to discover the changes and challenges someone on oxygen has to make.  Although, I have to admit, it is quite amusing at times… especially when tangled in the oxygen tube.

Then the fourth novella in the companion series to the Apostle John Series books would not be published. (Getting close.)

So, what does looking back achieve?

“For whatever was written in former days was written for our instruction, that through endurance and through the encouragement of the Scriptures we might have hope.”
Romans 15:4 ESV

Giving up was not the way these people handled adversity

Joseph, favorite son of his father Jacob had many opportunities to give up. His half-brothers’ jealousy escalated to such a degree they put him in a pit and were going to kill him.

What was going through Joseph’s mind?

Instead, Joseph was sold to spice merchants on their way to Egypt. There the spice merchants sold him as a slave. (Read the story in Genesis 37:12-35)

Moses could have thrown up his hands in defeat many times, as he led the often-rebellious children of Israel through the wilderness.

I look at the lives of the prophets, and sigh at what they went through… without giving up.

Jumping forward in time…

Did the Apostles think of giving up?

History says all but one were martyred, and the Apostle Paul mentions his many trials.

For those of us who have Christian faith, where would our faith be without the record they left us.

When researching for the Apostle John Series I was awed at what the early Christians endured. Some went to the arena; others were tortured, enslaved, or burnt as torches for Nero’s parties.

In many cases Christians could have escaped persecution by the simple act of taking a pinch of incense, tossing it the fire at an statue of Caesar, and saying, ‘Caesar is Lord.’ That would have broken the first commandment, and most chose to suffer the penalty.

We have not been called to such challenges, but we have, and do, experience other overwhelming difficulties at times.

giving up, drowning in problems

Back to the suicide figures

More people than would like to admit have, at some point in their lives contemplated suicide. From the figures in Australia alone, many have attempted to kill themselves.

Do we shrug and sigh, then continue on, or do we wonder what we could have done if someone we know succeeds in killing themselves?

It is a two-way street. The person desperate enough to want to give up needs to find the courage to talk about it. Easier said than done.

No one to trust.

There are crisis lines where a stranger will listen. This might be a solution for those wanting to give up.

One such organization says on its webpage, “Professionally trained counsellors have specialist skills in working with suicide-related issues and they can help you to work through the pain and distress you may be feeling.”

What can we do?

If we see signs of someone withdrawing, instead of ignoring it, we can ask, “Would you like to talk about what you are feeling?”

If that seems too threatening, how about “You seem to be having a difficult time, is there anything I can do to help?”

We need to be prepared to listen. We need to be non-judgmental. A person on the point of giving up on life sees life differently to your viewpoint. Allow them their viewpoint before offering alternative views.

Sadly, the times we live in are not conducive to quietly walking beside someone in distress. Our lives are so busy, and self-concerned we might not notice. We might be struggling ourselves, but guess what, helping someone else can help you see your own problems in a different light.

Not giving up, giving

Here, some flowers for you… pass them on.

Susan

Susan Preston was a trained Mental Health Nursing sister and worked at an outpatient community clinic. She has a great deal of experience in counselling and caring for people with mental health issues. (Some of this knowledge made its way into the books she has written.)

Honor – Who or What Do YOU honor?

Don't wait till they are dead to honor them

Who or what DO you honor? This is the Easter long weekend. I know some families will have ‘the knock.’
You open the door and there is a police officer (or two) standing there. ‘The knock’ for my husband and I came at four in the morning.  Our son was not an Easter fatality, but the knock is the same horrifying reality for all who have experienced it.

There will be more fatalities during this time than at most other times of the year. “Drivers are urged to take extra care over the next few days with the Easter long weekend historically proving a dangerous one for fatal accidents.” 
https://thewest.com.au/news/wa/motorists-urged-to-drive-safely-over-the-easter-long-weekend-ng-b881173204z

Do we honor the road rules?

It would seem not. Queensland had a horror start to the Easter long weekend.

  • Police are concerned at the number of people who continue to drink-drive with 44 people charged on day one
  • 275 roadside drug tests were carried out on Thursday with 44 drivers testing positive to illegal substances.
  • 2,858 drivers were clocked by speed cameras going over the limit, while another 390 speeding fines were handed out by Police.
  • 29 people were busted using their mobile phones behind the wheel while 31 fines were handed out for seat belt offences.
    http://www.mygc.com.au/horror-start-to-easter-period-on-queensland-roads/

Across Australia, road deaths were already being recorded on Friday morning.

Do we honor our families?

Going by the Queensland statistics it would seem not. Most other States will have similar statistics,

What do those statistics speak of?

  • Selfishness
  • Disregard for the law
  • Lack of love for their families
  • Thoughtlessness
  • ‘It will never happen to me’

Unless someone sets out to deliberately murder another person, the answer fits somewhere in one of those categories.

Nevertheless, the result is the same. Deep hurt, unbelievable sorrow, guilt, emotional pain.  There are only a few pathetically inadequate words to attempt to describe the reaction to ‘the knock.’

honor before, not after death

‘Honor your father and mother’ is one of the Ten Commandments. Well, not only younger people have parents, so do grown-up children. The command to honor parents applies as long as the parents are alive.

Also children who are parents should think of their children.

Do you want your child/children to grow up fatherless or motherless?

Most people do not want that, many never think of the consequences, or realize this is what they are risking.

All of us need to be more ‘thinking’ people.

Allow me to tell you about the last night with our son.

Before 'the knock.’

It was a warm summer evening, and our son who had been through a dreadful week, was in a happier mood. His friend, who had recently passed his driving test, was coming to pick him up and they were going out.

Jim, (not his real name) hugged his Dad and I, and went out to meet his friend who waited at the end of our driveway. His father followed him part way, delighted that Jim seemed to have survived the terrible week.

“Dad,” Jim called, and his father went closer. “Look, a bird has fallen out of this small tree.” He looked down at the bird, and said, “It looks as if it cannot fly. Will you take it and put it in one of the trees in the backyard where it will be safer?”

Carefully taking the bird, a dove,  my husband saw it was indeed injured, and smiled. Not many teenagers were so kind and tenderhearted. Most would have walked past the bird on the ground, some not even noticing.

That was the last time we saw him alive.

After 'the knock’

We went through the same horror many others have suffered and are suffering.

Shock, horror, disbelief, guilt, wishing it was a nightmare and we would wake up and Jim would be back home. In all honesty, I can think of no words to describe the feelings that threatened to overwhelm us, not only then… but for a long time after.

honor road rules

You might not like the police, your parents, the rules, but believe this…
The rules are there for protection, not to make your life difficult.

Please, honor those who love you.

Obey the rules – and THINK.

With love

Susan

With heartfelt empathy for all who are walking this path, wherever you are on your journey.

Posted early in the hope it will save someone answering ‘the knock.’

Covet Explained in Fewer than 140 Characters

you covet my parking space

This week I have had to venture on the roads. I would rather miss driving at this time of year, just as I would prefer to miss going to shopping centres. Whether on the road, shopping centre carpark, or the shops themselves the absence of consideration is obvious. As I thought on it, a strange ‘light bulb moment’ went off in my mind. On the road, other drivers covet the space your vehicle is taking; in the shopping centre carpark where parking spaces are hard to find you might find a line of vehicles whose drivers covet the space you have.

Covet is an old-fashioned word

What does it mean?

“To desire wrongfully, inordinately, or without due regard for the rights of other:
Example: To covet another’s property.”
www.dictionary.com

 

The definition by the way is less than 140 characters, including spaces. I checked.

covet, character count

Now I will expand on that definition in more than 140 characters.
(Twitter has increased the character limit to 280 but I will go over that.)

In the Bible covet is mentioned in the tenth commandment. “You shall not covet anything that belongs to your neighbour.” (Abridged version.)

If you want a New Testament version, well, I think Jesus’ summary of the ten given in two commandments covers it.
“And a second is like it: You shall love your neighbor as yourself.”
Mark 12:31

Covet is a strange word for lack of consideration.

Well, covet has another meaning in the dictionary “to wish for, especially eagerly: 
Example: He won the prize they all coveted.”

self-centered

When it all boils down to a basic set of words, it is self-centeredness.

Why would I say that? Because if you peel the layers back like an onion, you might find it is putting your needs before those of others.

like the layers of an onion

If you leapfrog in and out of the traffic to get that little bit ahead. Chances are I will join you at the next set of traffic lights.

My nerves will be calmer.

If you are charging at me with your shopping trolley expecting me to get out of your way quickly, I won’t be able to.  I have to take a portable oxygen concentrator when I go to the shops, we cannot dodge a ‘speeding trolley.’

I will stop and hope you see me.

So, do not covet the space on the road, the carpark bay, or try to intimidate others out of your way in the shopping centres. Love your ‘neighbour’ as yourself.
We are all on this planet together, so we are neighbours.
Slow down, it might save your life.

Thinking again,

Susan

 

Piracy Three Ways

piracy flag, image of skull and crossbones on flag

What is piracy?
Anything from piracy on the seas to piracy of books, records, movies.

Piracy on the Seas

SINGAPORE — The Ai Maru steamed alone under night skies on June 14 when a speedboat slipped in from the darkness and overtook the tanker about 30 miles off the coast of Malaysia. At 9:15 p.m., seven men with handguns and knives clambered up over the side, smashed through doors, tied up crew members at gunpoint and bashed the Ai Maru’s communications equipment.

The attackers stripped the 13 crew members of their personal belongings, locked them in a room and spent the next hours getting to the real work at hand: stealing the cargo. A second tanker, this one piloted by more pirates, pulled alongside. The maritime robbers siphoned a total of 620 metric tons of marine gas oil from Ai Maru to their own ship.

https://www.cnbc.com/2014/09/15/worlds-most-pirated-waters.html

Dictionary.com defines a different kind of piracy as…

“The unauthorized reproduction or use of a copyrighted book, recording, television program, patented invention, trademarked product, etc.”

If we are honest… we will admit that at some time in our lives most of us have been guilty of this kind of piracy.

Common reasons I have heard for burning, copying for a friend, or lending a book are…

“Well, that company makes millions anyway.”

Yes, usually that company does – but it is still theft. The big company can write off these debts, but the recording artist or author only receives a small portion of the price – he or she is the one most hurt by this kind of piracy.

The shipping company in the first example probably was insured, might have had to pay a larger premium, but people in the second category have no such protection. A royalty payment is lost.

There is another kind of piracy…

When piracy is a scam.

piracy. Unauthorised download offered

Every now and again I am informed of Hold the Faith being available free in any digital format. This was the case a few days ago – I decided to check it out. 

I am sharing this – not because of a huge loss, but because of my discovery of the  enormity of the scam.

I know I have excellent antivirus and security software, so I clicked on each of the buttons in turn.

Each button went to a different site – all had the same sign up free page. So, I did an online search.

GoMediaz, PlayJoltz, and Pepplay were the three sites, each linked to one of the buttons. Google listed each of these, and a page (maybe more) of scam warnings.

It saddened me to read of how many people who had signed up for a free account, and had to provide a credit card number, found their card had regular deductions from the company although no purchase had been made.

piracy, Google alert of unauthorised download
Note: This is an old version of Hold the Faith

All three had identical ‘sign-up’ forms…

reply from piracy company

But I did not want to sign up for anything. I wanted a contact address.

Eventually, I did find addresses for two of them.

I found email addresses for two of the ‘companies’ and sent a short email asking them to remove my book from their database.

Identical email replies were received…

 

After hearing comments from other authors in some groups I am a member of I decided to write this blog – as a warning to save some from being scammed.

In order to take screenshots I found the ‘alert’ and clicked on the buttons again.

To my surprise, they now linked to another set of three websites.

See the images below.

piracy, warning by a scammed user
Scam alert

The extent of the piracy/scamming astounds me.

I decided to contact Google and ask why the addresses from the same alert now led to a different set of websites. (All, like the first three – scammers.)

It was hard to obtain an email address for Google, and I didn’t want an American phone number. Apart from the cost, it is night time there when I am writing this.

I found a link to an Australian Google address.

It was blocked by my antivirus software.

When I was a computer trainer, if I had a class of newbie users, I used to take examples of scam emails from various banks, PayPal, and credit unions to show the class how to identify the scam mails, show them the real sites, as well as tell them what to do.

“Is it safe to go online?” some might bemoan.

A    Only if you keep your wits about you.

And remember the old saying… ‘If it Sounds Too Good to Be True, it Probably Is.’

With these free sites – who offer books, music, movies… always remember that not everything is as it seems.

Sadly, it seems to be ‘human nature’ to want something for nothing. For hundreds of people that desire ended up costing them a great deal of money as well as frustration.

I have written this post to raise awareness and so that some, perhaps you, might be spared from these traps.

Troubled by the piracy,

Susan

piracy cartoon image